blood stories

Getting a blood test is a huge pain in the arm. Not only is it a literal pain in the arm, but your blood has to be sent off to a lab somewhere and processed and analyzed and computerized, which is expensive and takes forever. This card, called the V-Chip, can run 50 different blood tests in seconds right before your very eyes, for just $10.
One cow contains approximately eight gallons of blood. When cows are magically turned from things that smell bad into things that taste good, all of that blood generally goes to waste. But it need not be wasted, for it can now be used to make large structures and waterproof bricks that also happen to look kinda like fresh-baked brownies. Mmm, brownies.