Warner Entertainment's ridiculous new plan for legal DVD rips

Want to know what a desperate last-ditch effort from a movie studio to hang on to an outdated business model looks like? Warner Bros. Home Entertainment Group is about to try to convince you that instead of ripping or pirating your DVDs, you should go to a store and pay them to make you a DRM-encumbered copy that lives in Warner's cloud.

"'Disc-to-digital' is the solution to unlock the value of existing libraries," [Warner Home Entertainment Group President Kevin Tsujihara] said. "We're leading industry efforts to launch services so consumers can convert libraries easily, safely and at reasonable prices." The first phase of "disc-to-digital," Tsujihara said, will let DVD owners take their discs into stores that will handle the digital conversion. Later on, Internet retailers like Amazon.com will email customers to offer digital copies of DVDs they previously bought.

Look, dude: I own your stupid DVDs. I already paid for them. In some cases, I paid like 20 bucks, which is almost certainly more than they're worth, since I have terrible taste in movies. And now you're trying to tell me that to watch my own movie collection whenever and in whatever format I want, I have to bring my DVD into a store and pay you more money so that you'll make me a digital copy that lives in your proprietary cloud that I can't access without having an Internet connection and dealing with whatever slow, unreliable, and ad-laced service that you decide to half-ass into existence?

How about no.

Want to know why piracy is such a big problem? This is why. It's your fault. I'm perfectly happy to pay for digital media (TV, movies, music, games, whatever) as long as it's convenient, reasonably priced, and I get control of what I pay for. This service you're proposing strikes out on all three of those. It's not easy, because I have to go somewhere. It's not a reasonable price because I own the freakin' DVD already. And it's not safe, because I'm probably several hundred times more likely to die in a car accident lugging my DVD collection to your ridiculous store than I am to die sitting at my computer pushing the "illegally rip this" button a bunch of times.

Look, Warner: the problem is not the service itself. The problem is the mindset that even suggesting something like this shows that you have. If I buy a DVD from you, it's mine. I should be able to watch it when I want and where I want. Why on Earth would you think that I should have to pay you more money for access to my own property? I don't want to be a movie pirate. I don't want to have to download illegal programs to crack copy protection on DVDs. But you're the company that's created this culture, that's reinforcing this culture, and the company that continues to give this culture a reason (and the will) to exist.

Via LA Times

Editor's note: We don't often say this because it's rarely relevant (not to mention abundantly clear — just look at our logo up top — but DVICE is owned by Syfy, which is owned by NBCUniversal, which is owned by Comcast, which is probably owned by some secret corporation with extraterrestrial ties. None of this influenced the tone of this article. If any of the companies named here came out with a disc-to-digital solution like the one written about above, it'd be just as stupid.

For the latest tech stories, follow DVICE on Twitter
at @dvice or find us on Facebook