Co-workers driving you mad? Don't like your office chair? Secretary forgot to put sugar in your tea? Well, cubicle jockeys, here is the answer: the USB chainsaw. Just $59.95 plus shipping* will allow you to go postal in your office — after all, who's not going to lend you their stapler if you're brandishing this baby?
As peripherals go, however, it's not quite the USB Trouser Press that I've been lobbying those clever people at Brando, Thanko et al for (I am, as you should know, a lover not a fighter.) But do you know what? It comes pretty darn close.
*Do you think this might be a joke? Answers on the back of a magician's assistant (Magic Circle-approved) please.