The world is about to leap into the fourth Indiana Jones adventure, opening in theaters on May 22nd. Mere talk of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull gets us wishing we were on the road to adventure, digging up fantastic objects, dodging bullets and fists and emerging victorious from the jaws of death.
We’re not going to be able to do any of that without the proper equipment, however. We're going to need some serious globe-trotting, Indiana Jonesin' gear. That’s why we searched the world over, finding just the right stuff for a fantastic adventure. We have an advantage over the latest Indiana Jones adventure, which is set in 1957. Fast forward to 2008, where we can arrive at the archaeological dig with much more powerful tech in tow.
You’re going to need to outrun some extremely bad guys and gals over rough terrain, so this Ferrari SUV will certainly come in handy. It’s a five-passenger luxo-sport fire-breather with a price to match: Expect to hit the adventure trail in 2010 for around $200K.
Indy needs to figure out that guns are too messy and brutal, and today’s tech lets you stop thugs without killing them. That’s where this $280 Taser C2 can help, stopping those ogres for 30 seconds from up to 15 feet away, giving you time to get away to more adventuring, with both you and your enemies unscathed.
Of course, you’ll want to dress the part when you undertake your Indiana Jones adventures, so here’s the exact same Fedora, jacket and bullwhip Indy wears in the movies. Made by the craftsmen who created the film props, these offer the ultimate in realism. Better be prepared to pay dearly, though — the 10-foot David Morgan bullwhip costs $865, the Adventurebilt Deluxe Fedora is $692, and the jacket, $279.
What adventurer would leave home without a GPS navigator? This $209 Garmin nuvi 350 was rated a Best Buy by Consumer Reports, and you can use it hand-held in the field or atop the dashboards of that SUV or motorcycle.
For a true Indiana Jones adventure, you’ll need to do some actual archeology, so here’s the rock-busting Makita Demolition Hammer to do your destructive bidding. Even the most stubborn tombs will open to this $850 monster’s 1450 blows per minute. Just don’t forget the ear protection — this jackhammer cranks out a world-class racket, to the tune of 130dB.
The next time your gracious hosts place a monkey head in front of you to savor, substitute this WowWee Chimpanzee Alive Animatronic head in its place, explaining that you can’t eat it because see, it’s still alive! It might be worth the $100 price just to see their faces when they cut into its head and see, instead of their favorite delicacy, a bunch of wires, servos and circuit boards.
If you’re like Indiana Jones, you’ll be getting into a lot of fistfights. The Nintendo Wii offers the perfect training tool: WiiSports Boxing. These special gloves will make your training sessions even more realistic, giving you an advantage over those dozens of enemies that are sure to be attacking you, all at the same time.
Forget those old vintage 1957 Harley motorcycles with their tippy sidecars. Get yourself one of these Superside FIM sidecar racers, and your chase scenes will last all of a couple of seconds. A rig like this starts with a $11,400 Suzuki GSX-R1000 bike, and is extensively modified to accommodate your daredevil sidecar rider. Just make sure you’re the one in the driver’s seat.
If your adventure is like Indy’s latest, you could make things easier for yourself and just buy a crystal skull. Of course, it’s not going to be equipped with exquisite features that took 300 years to build, such as varied angles in its interior that make the eyes seem to glow with light refracted from above. That would be a priceless antiquity, such as the one currently under lock and key at the British Museum. But with this $35 clear resin replica, you might be able to fool a dopey bad guy or two long enough to make your escape in one piece.