Pole Dancer Alarm Clock helps you rise to the occasion

Thank goodness the lovely damsel — let’s call her Dawn — wrapped around this Pole Dancer Alarm Clock remains fully clothed, or else all your lady friends visiting your bedroom might think you’re a bit sleazy. Risking your stellar reputation might just be worth the $39.72 price of admission in this case, especially if you loathe getting up in the morning.

Surely this is a piece of junk, which could be mightily improved if those two tiny lights actually lit up and did some rotating along with our gyrating temptress. And couldn’t she at least take her top off? Come on. What kind of strip joint is this, anyway? Music, a bikini-clad female and a pole do not a strip club make. Well, at least there’s a disco ball involved.

DrinkStuff, via Gizmodo