So let's see here… you've got your USB gloves and heated pants, so you're taken care of there. What about your feet? You need something nonsensically tied to USB to keep your feet warm or you'll never make it through winter! Oh God, hurry!
Ah, here we are. Thank you, Thanko. Wacky Far East electronics manufacturer Thanko has come to our aid with these heated USB speakers, allowing you to have warm feet as long as you don't mind having your footwear plugged into your computer. That could get annoying or even dangerous if you get up to get a drink and accidentally drag your laptop off the table. Maybe you could get that wireless USB hub and keep it in your pocket to solve that little problem. Hey, no need to thank me, it's what I do. I'm a problem solver.