Leave it to gadget makers to create a way to capture all of the exercise of skateboarding without the benefits of being outside, having fun, or looking halfway cool. Yes, the brilliantly named iJoy motorized balance trainer is just like a skateboard, except you stand on it without moving and hold a little remote control in your hand. It's safer than using the half pipe on a real skateboard, but hey, it's still hip, kids! Just ask the Sharper Image website: "Ride the powered iJoy® Board — it is awesome exercise!" Such natural and convincing ad copy has me sold. The iJoy is supposed to build muscles by making you balance, something you could probably do using a board balanced on a brick, but you can't control a board on a brick with a remote control, now can you? The iJoy is available online now for $300 and your last shred of dignity.